iamsammythecat:

I said to the human, “Look, human, you belong to me.”  Then I demonstrated by putting my paw on her.  Sometimes, humans need to be reminded of their properly submissive roles in cat/human relationships.  If you let the humans start to feel like they’re in charge, what’s next?  Not changing the littler box?  Altering the food schedule?  The human not petting me when I sit on her chest and wave my tail in her face?  No.  Unacceptable.  Humans must be made to understand their place.  The female human is lucky that I only put my paw on her arm.  I could have put my paw on her arm and stuck my claws out.  I am a great cat, though.  I know that authority must be tempered with mercy.  With great power comes great responsibility, you know.  Or you don’t know.  I totally just made that up.  I’m awesome like that.